For the next 7 days I’ll be sharing one story a day about a woman who reached her turning point. I don’t believe there is a single “way” to transformation. There is only our own unique way, and only we can do the work necessary to achieve our own sacred success…

We all have them: Those defining moments when the forces of head and heart come together with crystal clarity and we know that what we’ve been doing, or haven’t been doing, is no longer enough. For some of us it’s like standing at the edge of a precipice looking out at the vast open space beyond; for others it’s like standing at a fork in the road, looking left then right, but not moving because we can’t decide which road to take. Still others of us feel that nagging vibration in the pit of our soul that refuses to be silenced.

These moments are defining ones because it’s then that we realize we must make a decision: to jump; to turn in one direction or the other; to listen to the voice reverberating from some still small place within us. It’s then that we reach our turning point. That moment when we acknowledge the need to do something differently; to let go of something that’s holding us back and away; to step into the extraordinary life we glimpse on the other side. 

Laurie’s Story

In my professional life I followed the path of proving that I could do anything men could do, and better. I went to college, got a good job when I graduated, and started business school at night after working all day. For me, it was all about making money, and gaining power and responsibility. My father was a successful executive, but an angry, driven man, and my childhood fueled my single-minded need to be self-sufficient and invulnerable.

Throughout my 20s and 30s I found satisfaction in my work, rising up the ranks to the position of Vice President of Marketing for a Fortune 500 company at the age of 38. But as time wore on, the work and my experiences grew less and less positive, and I began to feel irritable and angry. Angry at the exceptionally long hours I had to put in; the missed birthday parties and family vacations; the company’s insatiable appetite for growth that wasn’t sustainable, and the endless changes in organizational structure and leadership.

I continued to do this work primarily for the security that came from a large, steady paycheck, terrific benefits, and being associated with some top marketing organizations. Honestly, I hated what I did for a living and who I’d become – as an employee and as a wife and mother. I was constantly angry, overly sensitive and disrespectful of others. I shut down and lost touch with the part of myself that was nurturing, creative and kind.

At the age of 42 I went through a very contentious divorce. After 14 years of marriage, apparently my husband hadn’t liked the person I’d become either. I woke up and said: “This is it. I have to make some changes.” I had to go through a gut-wrenching period of reflection and exploration to excavate the real person beneath all the anger and false bravado. I had to decide what values were most important to me and my children, and what I needed to do to stay true to those values. I wanted my two children to understand the importance of loving who you are and what you stand for.

I emerged committed to a new direction, a new way of living. I decided to start my own marketing business so I could do the kind of work that inspired me, with the clients I wanted to partner with, and be there for my kids in a way I couldn’t be before. In the six years since I made that decision, I haven’t looked back once.

 

I’d love to know what those of you reading this blog post feel about you own turning point. Have you reached it? What was it like for you? Are you beginning to feel that rumble, that nagging restlessness that’s telling you a change is coming? Please share your thoughts and comments here as we explore then next 7 days of turning points.

 

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Are you a woman executive whose career is beginning to wear like a tight-fitting pair of heels? If so, this call is for you! There is still time to register for my free one-hour teleclass: “Your Turning Point: The First Step Toward Your Extraordinary Life Waiting for You” scheduled for January 12, 2010 at 12:00 p.m. ET/9:00 a.m. PT. The only thing you need to commit to is 60 minutes of your time, and I’d love to have you be a part of the conversation and the journey.  You can learn more by following this link: http://www.evelynkalinosky.com/yourturningpoint.

 

Tagged as: authenticity, Business, Career, Career Change, Identity, Life, Professional Women, Transitions, Turning Point, Women Executives, Women Executives